Flooding

Spinning? I should have said drowning in self-delusion! One more time I got to the same place. I'm starting to think I've never moved from here and I've been in love with the same person over and over regardless of face and gender. It's the same. I praise myself of being a rational intelligent girl but when it comes to love it seems that my brain drowns in stupidity. I need to fall for the unreachable. Tina was the same thing and the worse part is I still care for her even though she is never there for me. Do I love me so little? I'm pretty much happy with me and what I have accomplished and with the person I'm now. But when love gets in the middle logic and wisdom go on vacations to wonderland! What he did or not isn't important I knew it was going to happen. every time this happens I end up feeling stupid and alone. I hate feeling stupid! But well who cares? Certainly I don't care about myself because I know he'll smile today and hug me and I'll fall for him again... And then he'll turn around and go with her even though he doesn't love her. Then again maybe he does...